The tire is flat...again. Every time I am in a hurry to go somewhere (which is makes up about 90% of my trips), it is flat. Everytime I say to myself "Self, you need to go down to Schwabs and have that fixed." I will make a mental note of it. Again. Here I am, standing in the freezing cold, running late, staring at a puddle of rubber that one resembled a tire. The drill is the same, unlock the garage, plug in the compressor, get the tire gauge. I'm as fast and efficient as any NASCAR pit crew member at this point. Thinking about digging out my button up flannel shirt from my Nirvana days since it has the perfect front pocket for my tire gauge. Full circle, you see.
January 10, 2011
2011: An Overview
Hangover, G.I. Joe shatters a molar requiring a $1000 crown (did I mention no dental insurance?), The flower shop I use to work at (and had the prospect of going back to work at) closed, the sudden death of Caplin Rous (the world's most famous giant rodent I met in Texas and fell madly in love with), the cancellation of Paranormal State ending my weekly chance to foam at the mouth over Ryan Buell, and last but certainly not least, my son giggling and acting out (with pelvic thrusts) what it might look like if a Great Dane and a Chihuahua were mating. WTF? I'm not two weeks into 2011 and this is what it looks like? An omen, perhaps? At the risk of puking in my mouth from optimism, I am going to guess that I'm just getting the crap out of the way now. Speaking of which, I smell a litterbox that needs to be purged.
Monday, January 10, 2011
What the Hell-O am I thinking??
That's what was going thru my head as I parked on campus and made my way to the bookstore...walking by other students and feeling older and more out of place by the second...almost everyone looking like they were old enough to be my kids babysitter, granted a few others looked old enough to be my mother to. Once I actually got inside and saw the line at the bookstore I dropped the O in Hell-o and asked myself again...WHAT ARE YOU THINKING???
Standing in line...Listening to children (which come on, let's be real here...that's what they are!) drop the F-bomb and ruin their hearing with their i-pod's, I resist the urge to ask them if they kiss their momma with that mouth and grab their trendy little Apple toy and turn the volume down for them...Oh man... when did I reach THAT age?!! I watch the employee run the line and come up with about 5 more ways it could be far more efficient and fast in 30 seconds...(Hey, I'm a woman and a mother...it's what we do.) Finally get to the front of the line to even get into the bookstore and I suffer the insult of ALL insults given what I've just experienced in the last 40 minutes... HE, a man at least 20 years my senior...calls me Ma'am. I must have given him the raised eyebrow glare cause he stepped away from me rather quickly. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all fine with manners but you better be a Boy Scout trying to help me across the street when I'm 80 if your going to call me Ma'am... Either that or I better have a ruler in hand, with thigh high stockings, a short skirt, and pig tails if your even going to consider using that word before I'm 80! You've been warned! I'm pretty sure in that moment I sighed and accepted my fate...I am a married, 36 year old mother of 3 that has gone off her rocker and decided she needed to pursue the dreams of her youth...or at least the ones she can still have because I'm not sure i'll ever get back my 21 year old body. So the challenge: To see just exactly what I was made to be outside of dinner and diaper changes. The rewards: Besides even more work for me, well... I guess it's to know I can and to do something I thought I could.
Fast Forward 1 hour, dinner figured out, glasses picked up for my oldest son, backpack stolen from the same son, packed with used books that still cost WAY to much, address of the university hall programed into my phone and I'm in the car with no little voices telling me they have to go potty, or their hungry, or asking how much longer till we get there...I realize then that this is it, that I'm really doing this, it's real, and scary, and exciting all at the same time...Dorthy, your NOT in Kansas anymore...I start the car, deep breath and here goes nothing... or something...and really...everything.
Standing in line...Listening to children (which come on, let's be real here...that's what they are!) drop the F-bomb and ruin their hearing with their i-pod's, I resist the urge to ask them if they kiss their momma with that mouth and grab their trendy little Apple toy and turn the volume down for them...Oh man... when did I reach THAT age?!! I watch the employee run the line and come up with about 5 more ways it could be far more efficient and fast in 30 seconds...(Hey, I'm a woman and a mother...it's what we do.) Finally get to the front of the line to even get into the bookstore and I suffer the insult of ALL insults given what I've just experienced in the last 40 minutes... HE, a man at least 20 years my senior...calls me Ma'am. I must have given him the raised eyebrow glare cause he stepped away from me rather quickly. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all fine with manners but you better be a Boy Scout trying to help me across the street when I'm 80 if your going to call me Ma'am... Either that or I better have a ruler in hand, with thigh high stockings, a short skirt, and pig tails if your even going to consider using that word before I'm 80! You've been warned! I'm pretty sure in that moment I sighed and accepted my fate...I am a married, 36 year old mother of 3 that has gone off her rocker and decided she needed to pursue the dreams of her youth...or at least the ones she can still have because I'm not sure i'll ever get back my 21 year old body. So the challenge: To see just exactly what I was made to be outside of dinner and diaper changes. The rewards: Besides even more work for me, well... I guess it's to know I can and to do something I thought I could.
Fast Forward 1 hour, dinner figured out, glasses picked up for my oldest son, backpack stolen from the same son, packed with used books that still cost WAY to much, address of the university hall programed into my phone and I'm in the car with no little voices telling me they have to go potty, or their hungry, or asking how much longer till we get there...I realize then that this is it, that I'm really doing this, it's real, and scary, and exciting all at the same time...Dorthy, your NOT in Kansas anymore...I start the car, deep breath and here goes nothing... or something...and really...everything.
Purpose...Got One?
I ask myself that a lot these days. Nothing like unexpected death to get your mind reeling and asking a lot of questions... reevaluating your whole life and asking...am I enough? Am I everything God designed and envisioned me to be or am I a serious slacker cause I'm scared or comfortable, or I let the world and some around me shape my view of me and what I ought to do. What am I supposed to do? Have I done enough? Have I ran the race as though to win it? My answer is a big fat NO. I know I matter, I know I've done a lot and I make a difference in the lives of my children especially, but am I teaching them the really important things and to really reach for those goals and dreams that I like to tell them to reach for? If not...their going to see right thru me pretty darn quick... and then, did I matter at all or will I just be the eye roll when one of them says Mom used to tell me to do this...thing was, she didn't do it herself! When I die tomorrow, 10 years, or please... 64 years from now...will I have won the race? 10 years from now will I be sorry I did something or sorry I didn't if I don't make big changes now? All good questions and lately part of my everyday thinking...The thing is, I'm not all alone in asking these questions am I? Admit it...you have at one point in your life asked to. Call it a mid mid life crisis, call it temporary insanity, call it to many fruity Long Island Ice Tea's at Applebee's...but you know as well as I do...you've done it...and if you haven't yet...sorry to be the bearer of bad news but...it's coming. This I know for sure.
On what seems like not enough girls nights you will find us around a table threatening to sing Karoke and discussing the good, the bad, and the ugly...or aka...I hate this part of my body! When did the people in this place become closer in age to my kids then they did to me? My spouse doesn't get it! What do I want to be when I grow up? How long will I have to date now that I'm divorced and how many frogs do I have to kiss? He did what...Seriously!? I needed that promotion and they promoted a 22 year old kid! The list can go on and on and on...Matter of fact...that's how the idea of this blog was born. One night we started talking about how wonderful, funny, or laughingly pathetic life really is and that we could all write a book and split up the chapters. We're all the same age and in different stages and seasons but yet we're all asking the SAME questions and finding common ground in the topics and helping each other thru the issues to the answers...So, long story short, if you choose to read this blog, what you will see is smart, beautiful, funny and so NOT size 6 women and their wonderful, funny, or laughingly pathetic yet amusing stories and perspectives as we REDEFINE LIFE as we know it. There may even be an occasional guest Male writer so that we can have a different perspective...and be reminded that we really are always right. ;) Don't worry...I'll give them the really good topics. lol! Hope you'll join us on the journey...it's going to be a heck of a ride.
On what seems like not enough girls nights you will find us around a table threatening to sing Karoke and discussing the good, the bad, and the ugly...or aka...I hate this part of my body! When did the people in this place become closer in age to my kids then they did to me? My spouse doesn't get it! What do I want to be when I grow up? How long will I have to date now that I'm divorced and how many frogs do I have to kiss? He did what...Seriously!? I needed that promotion and they promoted a 22 year old kid! The list can go on and on and on...Matter of fact...that's how the idea of this blog was born. One night we started talking about how wonderful, funny, or laughingly pathetic life really is and that we could all write a book and split up the chapters. We're all the same age and in different stages and seasons but yet we're all asking the SAME questions and finding common ground in the topics and helping each other thru the issues to the answers...So, long story short, if you choose to read this blog, what you will see is smart, beautiful, funny and so NOT size 6 women and their wonderful, funny, or laughingly pathetic yet amusing stories and perspectives as we REDEFINE LIFE as we know it. There may even be an occasional guest Male writer so that we can have a different perspective...and be reminded that we really are always right. ;) Don't worry...I'll give them the really good topics. lol! Hope you'll join us on the journey...it's going to be a heck of a ride.
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